I can hear you,
and so do I listen,
to your screams and yells,
but you're always dissin`.
I don't do to you,
as you do to me.
I don't try to hurt you,
when you try to hurt me.
I am so scared,
my soul so empty,
my heart filled with anger,
with anguish and envy.
Your showing your hate,
toward me and my sister,
we take in the pain,
and you cause us to suffer.
I keep trying so hard,
these days are so long,
you know I'll never want to be,
like you, so mean,
so strong and still so wrong.
Some kind of pleasure,
found in what you do,
not quite sure,
that I really know you.
You’re different somehow,
changing your ways,
you’re just not the same.
Sometimes I talk back,
"leave me alone" I yell,
as I slam my door,
when I wake up the next day...
My door has vanished,
completely off the hinges.
I tell you to stop,
but you keep on.
I'm stuck in this world,
can't find my way out.
You look into my eyes,
and I start to cry.
This pain that I hold,
just won’t go away.
You don't know how much you hurt me,
although I want to let you know.
I threaten to leave you,
not ever come back,
not really sure where I will go.
I say bad things,
that I don't always mean,
but whatever I do,
you do worse to me,
and the things that you do,
I want to do back,
but deep in my heart,
I know you could kill me,
and I'm not ready to die,
so back to my room,
I slump back to sleep,
I lie myself down,
and cry till I sleep.
Why do you keep yelling,
even in my dreams.
I hear every damn word you say,
so why repeat yourself every single day?
It makes me only madder,
I want to rebel,
but then I will only fall deeper
into an unknown hell.
A coma in a hospital,
alone and afraid.
I am lonely with out you,
so sad, but yet true.
But deep in my soul I'm glad.
I hope and pray for just one day,
when I don't have to hear you.
I just can't wait for that day to come,
why do you think my reasons are dumb.
Sqeeky tires,
everyone has stopped.
I can hear the sirens from afar,
I can see the roof of your car.
I hope for it to not be,
because now as I sit here,
my hands pressed together,
I begin to pray.
For now,
I wish I hadn't seen,
what so badly I wanted to see.
When I make my way down,
I see someone’s blond hair, not yours,
although I can see your car.
Your in it, and I am so scared.
I don't want to see you,
blood filling your knotted hair.
When I go into the waiting room,
they come tell me she's dead.
Now as I look back and remember blond hair.
Wasn't yours, who's could it have been?
You were selfish and greedy,
and I didn't know what to do,
but it had turned out,
that she had died too.
She had a daughter,
one just like me,
you ruined her life,
and mine too, that day.
It wasn't her fault,
but yours, just like it always was.
You were drunk when it happened,
they said it was quick,
no pain was felt,
nor any tear had fell.
Just hazy and black,
for there was no one to tell.
So scary here,
up so high,
I'm not quite sure
that I'm ready to die.
I sigh,
I jump,
I fall,
I cry,
It feels as if,
I can almost fly. . .
but then I hit the ground.
Blood all over,
as I hit with a splat.
Please help me.
Tell my brother that I love him,
my sister to be brave,
and my dad not to be afraid.
As suddenly blood squirts
from my veins.
The voices are leaving,
no more can I hear.
I have gone peacefully,
no more shall I fear.
I knew it was the only way,
to take my own life,
on that cold winter day.
Now I am really gone,
there is no coming back.
I am happy now,
all belongings shall I pack.
In my last coma,
so happy and glad
you didn't put me here.
I was tortured,
But now I'm finally free.
Now I am alone,
empty and void,
abandoned, vacant,
bare and stripped,
of everything.
Good-bye!
