You've Never Been There

I don't understand how you can be this way,
I don't understand how you can say all the things you say.
I don't know what I did to make you the way you are,
I don't know what I did to make you come at me like we're at war.

I try to make you happy.
But all you do is try to make me feel crappy.
I'm always there for you when you need someone to talk to,
But you're never there for me to do the same.
You use me and abuse me,
And the claim not to be able to see,
Why your own parents call you a horrible mother.

Try looking at yourself through my eyes,
You'd see all your lies,
All the tears you have made my cry.
All the scars on my arms,
From all the times you've given me harm.
All the times I wished you were a good mother,
All the times I wished you'd left me with my father.

You'd be overwhelmed with this pain inside me,
And wonder how you were so blind as not to see.
You'd see that I'm not at all free,
All you do is use me.
I'm a full-time babysitter and maid,
And the one time I asked to be paid,
You ranted and raved,
And said that if I wanted to pull that,
Rent was due in 7 days.

You don't know the pain I feel,
At knowing that my teenage years,
Have gone down the drain.
I am never able to go out with friends,
I never have any money to spend.
I am locked up inside this house,
Never to have fun, never to play in the outside world.
But you get to go out for days on end,
Spending all the money you have to spend,
And seeing who you want until your hearts content.

All my life you've never been there.
A joined conversation has always been rare.
I don't talk to you about my life,
You'd just yell and scream at me.
I wish things could be so different,
That you had a motherly commitment,
But here I am raising your two other kids,
And here I am alone all the time.

Thanks mom,
I love you too.
You're really screwed up in the head though,
But you'll never change and I've come to face it.
So, thanks to you never being there,
My whole childhood has been wasted.
Wow Mom, thanks so much for caring.