Sacred Pain

I sat in my darkened room
Not ready to face my doom
But I knew what I had to do
I had to pull through

Tears streamed down my pale sad face
This would be something I could never erase
But to do this, would be the best
And it would lift a great weight off my chest

My shaky hand held my escape in front of me
I guess this would finally set me free
But if I did do it, if i did let go
Wouldn't i be my own foe?

Thoughts chased each other through my mind
Think of all the people I would leave behind!
But this is the only way
I must do this today!

But as I brought the blade down into my flesh
And the blood and cut once again became fresh
I felt a scream burst out from severe pain
As warm blood spilled out of my vein

I felt light headed and overwhelmingly stupid
And I dropped the knife covered in red fluid
I followed the knife and dropped to the ground
Holding my bloody wrist, dumbfound

As I became earthbound, I realized I didn't want to die
But I felt so woozy, it was too late, It was time to say good bye
My tears poured out like a hard rain
As my body increased in pain

I knew I was to say farewell
To those not yet in hell
So I whispered each name
As I fell to shame

Fell to know that i had made a blunder
And that now I must go under
Goodbye to all of those alive
Goodbye to all who still survive