Miss Fortune

When she was younger, she was quite fine
She once made a habit of being most kind
Christened Rebecca on her third day
Given whatever she asked on a plate

Miss Fortune, her title
Miss Fortune, her name
Misfortune she causes
when she marries Lord Strange

She was raised under disciplinarian rule
Which only got hard at Catholic school
No boys allowed, no hands on the desk
Don't slouch your shoulders, and cover your chest

The nuns were always talking about rules
Rebecca followed obedient, God's favorite tool
She went where needed, did always as told
Her heart, her soul, her mind on hold, until she began to grow bold

Rebecca stepped out of her Habit, Freshman year
Smoking in the girl's room and drinking beer
One night was this boy, next day was another
"Do I know you," She asks, "or was that your brother?"

Then she met Atticus, boring and Strange
Pride of no measure, he was so vain
"I'm not destructive, I'm not destructive"
He insisted each time she threatened to leave him

She had many wonderful suitors
But none of them properly suit her
She fell for the man who never remembered her name
She fell head over heals for Atticus Strange

Miss Fortune, she bears
Miss Fortune, her shame
Misfortune she carries
because she lost in this gain

Miss Fortune who went to Hawaii every year
Now sits at home, her parents paying arrears
But smile, all must be happy, no one can know
Denial becomes Miss Information, while she unplugs the phone

Misfortunate, Miss Information
No one denies what you say
No one speaks up much at all
Because all are afraid of Lord Strange