Floating Above Reality

No one seems to understand
All of this pain I’m in
I know I am hurting the ones I love
By committing this horrible sin.
Yet with every cut I make
The blood sends a sudden relief through me
It’s something I can’t fully explain
To know what happens you have to see.
See all the pain I endure
And how self-injury is the key
To relieve my stress and tears
And finally help me.
But then I hear that voice
Telling me I’m committing a sin
Yet I hear another voice inside
Telling me it’s time for my life to end.
I don’t know which way to go,
I don’t know whom to believe
But with every minute that passes
The more I just want to leave.
Leave this awful world
And everyone in it
And yes I would be sorry
But my pain, nobody seems to get.
I need to be understood
I don’t need this pain in my life
All this shit makes me wonder
Why I ever picked up that shiny knife.
Yet in the distance
I can hear myself cry
I’d do anything to end this pain
I’m even willing to die.
Then I realize I’m floating
Floating around these ribbons of red
I feel my pain slowly slipping away
As I come to see my body lying dead.

~Madison Kay Leigh~ July 3rd 2005