wow! this poem was soooo good. the rhyming was excellent! 5/5

this poem was great....descriptive. i really like it.

*sighs* this reminds me of the guy i have a major crush on.... great poem. luvs it

Lovely flow...great rhyming...there are a few spelling errors I think though...hope things get better for you...

xxx

awwwwwww.....thats really sad but well written! ur heart will heal dun worry

the flow was good I liked it

passsionate write with a nice flow

really good work... i understand how u feel... sometimes its better to just let go i guess..

I know that feeling so very well...I hope that you're alright and if you ever need to talk, I'll always be there...

Josiah,

Everything about this poem broke my heart bit by bit. Awesome lines...this has to be about the same person. Am i right? It can always work out, she'll realize that she really needs you in her life...so keep your head up. :) Sorry it took so long for me to comment back...anyways, fine job.

Peaces. //Ari\\

a cute poem. but it should be in the "lost love" category. anyways, that doesnt really matter now. I only saw a few spelling mistakes, try to go through your poems and make sure the words are correct before you post it. sometimes it can be hard for the reader to understand what your trying to say. Make sure the reader get what you want them to get. I'm saying this to try to help you on your poetry. not to be mean. It wasn't a bad poem, just gramatical errors.

Take Care,
Renee

Great poem, i understand what it's like to feel this way... Great deal of passion in this poem! Keep it up:D

Ana*

okay that was a good poem kbut will you stop writing about me please i know they are about me becasue i was the one that left you and your profile needs to change if you found someone new i know youo think i cheated on you but really i didnt when im with my family you shouldn't have called me as much as you did i dont need another dad

Krissta

errm only if you dad really new you anyways besides who said these poems were really to you can\'t I just write sad poems with out some one thinking its about them?

your dad doesnt even know you you sis would agree ;)

-Josiah

Your^

*sigh* this poem was a little hard to read. rhyming every line makes it become a little boring...and then i noticed, that in some stanzas you didnt' even rhyme at all. I all wanted to say to u, is try to keep up with ur rhyme scheem, and rhythem. maybe, try rhyming every other line...make things a little more interesting. This poem had a nice message, but it was a little hard to find. Hope that helps a little.

Wow that was really sad...i can really relate to the confusion of it all..its crazy isn't it!!!!
take care x x x
PS: however great she must be...and i'm not doubting for a second she means the world to you..its not worth killing yourself inside...hope you're ok

Great poem. it had so much emotion in it. keep up the good work.

Hey.. nice poem.. i lyk ur rhyme scheme, but ur rhymes sometimes seem forced coz u had to rhyme 4 words at a time.. but other than that, u had gud words, tho i kinda got confused at places.. (tho i guess thats coz i wanna sleep :P).. gr8 work
im gonna read more later
take care
Nouna
thnx 4 the comment.. much appreciated

Thats deep. And it's exelent!

~Miranda~