Not a nightmare but reality

I was in town today,
I thought I would come see you,
Maybe it would help me believe,
You are really gone,
And that its not just a nightmare.

I walked up through the path,
I came this way 4 months ago,
This time it’s different though,
Only a few others in sight,
It was so quiet kind of scary.

I walked up the long path,
To wards where you lie,
I walk past a lad, who comments,
On the rose I'm holding asking who its for,
I just carry on walking.

When he sees me put it down,
On your grave, no headstone just a cross,
There’s a letter hanging on the cross,
Its from your mate saying she misses you,
Just like me.

As I sit there and talk to you,
I feel the tears welling up in side of me,
They start to cloud my eyes,
And begin to fall,
All I can ask is why.

I did not stay long I could not handle it,
As I stood up and said ill be back soon,
The lad came to ward me he said,
“You look like you need a shoulder to cry on”,
It shocked me but it did not stop me accepting.

It was nice to have someone there,
Although I wish it were you, who asked that,
And bought me back to reality,
Out of this nightmare, but it wasnt,
Awasn't isn’t a nightmare its reality.
I just don’t know how to face it.