Living -what hell

LIVING WHAT HELL BY ME

Oh God why? Please take this pain away
It hurts too much each and every day
I struggle to look always for the good
I panic that I may not find it as I should

Will I recognize and grasp the opportunities that come?
Or will I be so obsessed by sadness that I don’t recognize one?
Can the sweet mysteries of life still bring me joy?
Or will I be consumed with the loss of my husband and my only boy?

These days I shun thinking of what I once had
The joys and triumphs, the love and passion, the good and bad
Knowing as I do that it is forever gone spawns a pain I cannot bear
It shreds the very fabric of my tortured soul. I wish I didn’t care.