I chose

Why am I doing this?
I'm hurting you so much
I am aware that I am doing this
Yet I can't seem to give up

I can blame Eddie all I want
For the actions in which I partake
But deep down, I really know
That it's my fault and I'm to blame

I choose to starve myself
I choose to slit my wrist
I choose to listen to Eddie's voice
I choose to let Eddie win

I gave up too easily
I gave Eddie a head start
If I had of fought then maybe
He wouldn't have won so fast

And now, I have succumbed
To Eddie's painful grasp
I chose to let him into my mind
And now he owns me at last

I hate that I cause you pain
But I can't give Eddie up
I know it's selfish, but the truth is
I love Eddie much too much

So I'm sorry former self
I'm sorry Mum and Dad
But I chose Eddie over you
I chose to go mad