The endless swirl

by Lewis   Dec 22, 2005


Hope u guys dont care much about structure, mm i think this accauly more classed as a song but what the hell crit it as u will

feelings turning
essence burning
the endless world
is at its dawning

hope dies young
the crying of our lungs
the mourning heart sold
but the liver never bold
we are losing

nothing can change
nothing can be done
the course is set
just give it time
soon you shall see the greatest sacrifice is made

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by nadsyy

    Hey dis was reli gwd luved it..keep it up
    bye luv dia

  • 18 years ago

    by I.Lose.It.All

    Nice work, it was well thought out and congratues its very good.

    love always,
    jenny

  • 18 years ago

    by vince

    Wonderful

  • 18 years ago

    by I love anka - rooney !!

    Nice poem lewy do sum of mine some ***** rated all my poems 1 GRRRRR i hate it i need to repost them all!

  • 18 years ago

    by Wip lost the Rhythm

    I think this is ment to be a poem,
    the words are you own so why not put them in the structure you like

    thank you for commenting on my poem Swallowing the hurt
    it is based on real events in my life just changed and fictionalized some if you want to read my story its titled Broken and i wrote a poem with the title

    thank you for your critique and i look forward to reading more of your poems

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