Still

by gasping for air   Jan 1, 2006


I don't know who I am anymore
my heart aches
my mind cries out for release
but why
for what reason?
why do I feel this way
I don't have it that bad
there's worse
but i still feel this way
I want it all to end
I want to sleep for ever
and never wake
I keep expecting horrible things to happen
that will make me have more of a reason to end it
but they aren't
and I still want them
WHY!!!
why am I like this
I'm still hanging on
inside of me
my soul is still here
because of my angel
because of my zachary
if it wasn't for him I wouldn't be here
I wouldn't be writing this
he's my guardian angel
yet I can't banish these feelings
these thoughts for him
its so hard
but I'm trying
I'm still hanging on
I'm beating life back with a stick
I just hope it doesn't break.....

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by BrokenMisery

    You've got a great thought line, which I can tell you, I’m feeling the same right now! You have an interesting style of writing and I admire your lack of rhymes because a great deal of poets don't rhyme well, they make it like everyone else’s or it doesn't make sense. My first suggestion here is, especially in a poem like this, you need some more punctuation (remember when your talking to someone the way you say it can be just as meaningful as how you say it and it also makes it easier to read). Secondly I would test out some more imagery in your words, you don’t need to but it can enhance the feeling, meaning and can make it truly original, however, that’s completely up to you.
    Best of Luck, a Good Write!
    --Broken.

  • 18 years ago

    by DevilWithin

    I love that omg that so good, it would be nice to have a man you can trust and just have someone else so you can live on..

  • 18 years ago

    by Georgi

    Heya huni
    i love this part of your poem
    its so hard
    but I'm trying
    I'm still hanging on
    I'm beating life back with a stick
    I just hope it doesn't break.....

    it was an interesting lay out, i like it actually, u rote it well, well done, there was a sense of unknown pain. Good work
    xxxxxxx

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