Page from My Diary

by Brigitte   Jan 5, 2006


Forget it, you will never understand.
All you cared about was yourself.
I told you over and over those words that now Ive come to despise.
Who knew that so much hatred and resentment could come from 3 simple words?
"I love you"
Who knew it was all a lie?
You had me spinning out of control
You never gave a damn about anything but your own needs.
Im sick of throwing on a smile everyday to hide my inner pain.
You should have known my heart was too young to handle this painful burden you have placed upon it.
I gave you everything including my heart.
I gave you my trust when you pleaded for it.
And yet what did I gain?
You left me under a black blanket of lies,
Leaving me there to suffocate and hopelessly look for a way out,
That would never come.
You trapped me in a corner giving my no choice,
Slowly yet rapidly my body is breaking down,
My heart is crumbling to dust.
The only thing left is the broken, torn, and worn out memories of you and I.
Somehow I have to let them all go.
Memories that I once held so close to my heart,
Have now taken it over and killed it.
Slowly the happy memories of you and I are being replaced with the memories of you and her.
How could you be so heartless??
How was this all made into my fault?
Why cant I break through this sheet of ice?
This sheet of ice is like a window,
On one side I can see the lighted path to happiness.
But on the side Im left at I see nothing but black hatred,
That is enveloping a chest of happy memories we once shared.
Do you not remember them?
Do you even care?
Did you ever care?
Or was I just another girl on your list?
Oh how I wish I could step through the transparent Ice plate,
That so evenly divides happiness and despair.
But all it takes is one stab with my sword,
And the ice will break.
Never again shall I enter the blackened room of despair.
Standing up Im taking my sword and as Im about to jab it into the ice,
I look back at that chest of memories.
I walk slowly over to the chests obscured lid.
I lift it off and I find each memory we shared clearly written out on pink stationary,
But Im not here for those papers.
I start to rather quickly rip the papers out of the chest,
Carelessly tossing them on the cold ground.
Digging deeper and deeper into the chest until I locate the hardened stone bottom.
At the bottom of the chest under all those memories,
Were the pieces of my heart.
I gather them up gently in a velvet draw string bag.
I stand up, the pink memory papers surrounded my feet.
Lifting my head high I walk over the sea of memories,
And without looking back I jab the sword into the ice wall.
With a mighty shatter it falls.
The other side of happiness lays before me,
I walk into the lighted path and find the ultimate glue that will fix my heart,
You are my glue, my friends.
You are the glue that keeps my heart from Breaking again.
I love you all, and thank you for always being there for me!

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by PygmyPuff

    I gave this a five because the vocabulary and maturity exceeds so many stadards. However I have to compare it to molassas, or maple syrup. Its "sweet" but "thick"...Theres so much of it, its slightly a mouthful...Do you understand my maddness? You use these big words that make it good, but theres just so much that it takes the focus away from the poem as a whole, adn gives individual attention.

    [PygmyPuff]

  • 17 years ago

    by holly

    I love this just the way youve poured it all out it makes it easy to read even if its long and hard to keep attention on it i liked it really good i could feel the emoting xxALLYxx

  • 17 years ago

    by Darien

    This was a really long poem, but like a journal entry. It was full of detail, and it kept the reader interested. It was raw emotion and that made it really good.

  • 17 years ago

    by Wasted Fake Smiles

    Wow! that one was especially good bcuz i cood TOTALLY relate. that sounds exactly like my feelings a while back. anyway wow...gr8 work..again. 5/5
    ~*Who Cares?*~

  • 17 years ago

    by GR33N3Y3DB3AUTY

    WOW....iM CRYiNG WRiTE NOW...SERiOUSLY... i CAN COMPLETELY RELATE TO THiS..iT WAS SO DESCRiPTiVE AND WELL WRiTiN...i LOVE THiS POEM!! 5/5
    MUCH LUV
    ~CRYSTAL