Wishing Away My Life

There's a handful of things in my life,
That I still so mournfully regret.
It is the things that I've did and done.
It is the mistakes that I can't forget.

I wish I can travel way back in time,
To undo what my past had done.
And if I get a chance to start over.
I think I would start it with my son.

I wish I'd given him the love he deserved,
But I was never there when he was alive.
If only I had done my job as his parent,
Then maybe my son would have survived.

I wish I haven't failed his loving mother,
She had been nothing but faithful to me.
Yet I kept my heart locked in an iron box,
And refused to give her the only fitted key.

I wish I can watch the last sunset with her,
And get the chance to tell her "I love you."
I would wait until the sun disappear forever,
Just to hear her whisper a soft "I love you too."

I wish I was a responsible father and husband,
I know I should have put my wife and kid first.
If I were to be nominated for a single award,
I'd won the category of the best of the worse.

I wish I could change how things have turned out,
But fate itself was playing a different song.
It wants me to wallow up in a blanket of regrets,
And thoughts of everything that I did wrong.

I wish I was given another chance with my son,
I wish for an eternal sunset with my wife.
I wish I hadn't spent years wishing so much,
Maybe... I was wishing away my life.

~Atomic©