Very interesting the ending was cool. great job!

-Josiah

Wow that is a pretty cool poem. Back in middle school I had a friend who was really into Vampires and she got me into them too, so it was pretty cool. Your poem reminded me of a book called Vampire Kisses, (not saying you coppied or anything, just a random connection,) so if you like Vampires that book might interest you. I liked how you had it from the person's point of view who was being bitten, that was a cool way to write this poem. Nice job.

-Tainted Mikochan

A great vampire poem
i love vampires. you really captured the fear of the victem

Ruby

It was good, but it is too cliche. Why don't you twist it. Make it more original...

Well.. it was gud, but i guess im not into dark poems that talk about vampires or watever.. but u had gud rhyme and words.. i hust think u shud check ur spelling.. coz u got some misspelled words..
take care
Nouna

WOW!! This was awesome!
I loved the way it flowed and the way you managed to write it from the Victim'spoint of view.
I kinda agree with Ismail on this...it is a tad bit too cliche, but nevertheless, still a great write!
I'm a fan of vampires, but not the old fashioned 'bite-a-victim-and-they-die' or the 'get-bitten-and-become-a-vampire' type stories. If you're a fan, I's recommend you check out Darren Shan's stories.
Take care,
Luv Riffy xxx
=0)

This is a great poem..i love it..its got some really deep emotions in it. I like the way you worded it too. i can really relate to this verse "I cry out for help
But they walk away" Its a very touching poem, Keep it up =]
luv natz x0x

Wow this is very well written.. i really liked it and it is very original.. keep it up hun

sammie

I really liked the last stanza the way you wrapped it all up. I could picture the whole thing.

Hey Alyson,
You're really good. Gurl you have some real talent.

I love vampires and i love this poem

I loved it how you wrote it from the victims point of view....the of the poem was really good...I think you have real talent...plus I love vampires

I really enjoyed your poem!

I gave this one a 5. I like the use of vampires, sounds like a metaphor for back-stabbing friends. If I would suggest one thing, it's to make that metaphor just a touch more obvious, if it is a metaphor. If not, oh well, still good.

Afjdsafja;ja
you will never know how much i love vampires. You did an amazing job of capturing them, but ahh.
I love it.
amazing!

Nice work again, love the whole "vampires kiss" idea

This poem was really cool. i loved it!!

much love and many kisses,
bex