I'm expected to cope

It is expected of me to handle my own problems
to never let my true and inner side be known.
i am forever locking away my feelings.
my depression is a water that is still rising and is almost up to my mouth.
i cannot yell out for help, but this is all i want to do
i want a guy to come and help me from drowning... because my own friends cannot even care about me.
To them i am the invisible guardian angel whom they seek for advice.

but where do i turn who can i count on. who is there to help me and hold me tight through the hurt and suicidal emotions that i must get
past without acting on these emotions