They're in bits and pieces, but they're something of a story I could knit together later on. Tell me what you think...
It seems to the dreamer, the dreamer shall never wake up. Always lost in the darkness of depths and nothingness. If the dreamer where to shout, no one would hear him, and if he were to cry, no one would be there to comfort. What should the dreamer do in his world of make believe? Make up a new ending? But can one dreamer really do that?
And if you tell this dreamer to dance would he dance or stick his tongue out at you? If you told him to believe would he believe? If you told him to love, could our dear dreamer love? The dreamer is out subconscious. Can we tell our subconscious to dance? To believe? Or more importantly, to love? Can the dreamer be independent without the person?
If you tell the dreamer to scream, he just may scream. But what if he no longer can? No longer wants to or thinks (perhaps knows) no one can hear. What then, will our screaming dreamer do?
We are the dreamers of reality. No matter how much one screams, they will never be heard. I now dare this dreamer to be heard. Scream loud, I dare you. Cry your heart out dreamer. Just see how many really care as much as they say. I dare you dreamer.
I. F**king. Dare. You.
I enjoyed the poem Very much I truelyMakes you think, I think the reason someone may have rated it bad is cuz you swear at the end. I'm NOT the one who down rated you, infact i give them poem it self a 10/10 but i can olny give it a 5/5 but that'll do anyways, keep thinking up these things.. i totaly thrive on it lol
:O :O :O this was GREAT!! i LOVED it. the urgency of it all.... the truth of it all. in the second stanza, you said "The dreamer is out subconscious. "...im not sure if that totally works, or if i just cant understand it as well, but that was only one thing i saw in there that wasnt as flawless as the other parts. otherwise, WOW i think this would be something great.... it really makes people think about the dream of 'reality'....