I hate what i see

What do you do when you look in the mirror,
and hate what you see?

i see rosy red lips,
pale white skin,
vivid blue eyes,
and blonde hair that is thin,
but behind all this beauty,
i see so much more,
more then the eyes see,
what deep in my core,
inside me i see
like a monster who kills,
who draws blood from her enemies,
and who hardly feels,
im numb under my skin
the bones rattle and shake
i slither around you
like an unnoticed snake
i want to be pretty
like the girls in magazines
but i know im too different
i just want to scream