A-B-C's of a Lost Soul

Anger takes hold and plays it's part
Blinded by the tears that can no longer be kept inside.
Can't turn back now or my disguise will be unveiled.
Do you even see me...do you even know i'm there?
Emotions welling up inside, the ones i cannot hide.
Forgetting the past is not an option now...it's not like i haven't tried.
Growing within me is a pain I cannot release.
Hiding behind my curtain eyes...i'm tired of putting on this show.
I've been fooling myself all along in thinking you actually cared.
Just stop pretending and take off your mask, because I have done so as well.
Knowing what will happen next is not in the cards.
Losing grip is an understatement for what is happening now.
Maybe I dreampt it all, i always tell myself, but then I wake up from that dream and start to live in my same old nightmare.
No one will listen, no one understands.
Open up the sky and let lthe clean water fall onto this selfish facade.
People see right through me, I know they always have, but they haven't seen into my heart, the part that's been shattered.
Questioning the future is no longer in front of me.
Remembering these moments make me weak in the knees.
Slipping away from conciousness, sliding closer towards the edge.
Tears keep falling like a waterfall...even when there's nothing to cry about.
Under the water, I lay trying to recap.
Very little matters now, i'm numb from head to toe.
Weary, broken, and betrayed are the main words in my vocabulary.
Xylophones won't even bring me back to the masquerading world i used to know.
You don't understand that i'ts just ME know...i'm letting my true self show.
Zip me up inside myself and see what happens...you already did that once before and look where it's gotten me.
Now you see what I hide behind these fragile eyes...

...Will you judge me this time, as you did that last?...