Angry Temptations

A long, deep sigh,
With a river of tears that follow.
It is getting harder for me to breathe,
My throat is dry, I can hardly swallow.

Such a startling anguish,
As you carelessly threw me away.
But I didn't fight, I didn't beg,
No... not today.

I didn't run after you,
Even though you stole my heart.
I just stood and stared,
As my soul was ripped apart.

The anger flooded through my body,
As hatred stained my soul.
The space that was once yours,
Now nothing but a hole.

I see another guy,
And remember what he hated-
The thought of me with another guy,
I'm sorry, but honey, you're too late.

My heart has turned hard,
As I suddenly forget about him.
I do not know what to do,
But this temptation just might win.

I flick back my hair,
And batter my eyes.
Yes, I am back in the game,
Away from "love", hope that only dies.

Pleasure fills my body,
Now that I am with another guy.
As the passion reaches its peak,
I stop and wonder why.

How can I be with another man,
When my heart is not really there?
For my love is with my ex,
And doing this is not fair.

I try to substitute,
Something that cannot be replaced.
To be loved and held is all I want,
But if not with him, I am truly disgraced.

I try to shake these thoughts,
Push away these sensations...
For I am only doing this out of rage,
To hurt him, in my angry temptations.

I cannot do this,
Even though he destroyed me.
I know he will realize his mistakes,
He'll think I moved on, that is what he'll see,
But I never have,
And probably never will.
But I'm doing this for revenge,
Not the excitement or the thrill.