Welcome to my life...its not so good..

Im suffocating-dying no longer can i speak

i always try to do better than my parents but like them im weak

sellin drugs takin pills always makin a deal

not carin about nothin except not wanting to feel

im scared im human i feel so alone even in a crowd

i wish i could cry and get on with my life but im not allowed

crying is a weakness and showing how low and depressed i feel

crying is also a deadly punishment the doctor will drowned me in darkness with another pill

im sick of people complaining not knowing the word \"deprive\"

not knowing first hand what its like to fight trying to stay alive

they dont realise the horrors they see on tv is for real

i was a child being vio;lated in everyway-punished for no reason never knowing my next meal

people in so much pain they no longer feel

they take their pain out on everyone else thinkin it\'ll help them heal

but noone will listen they act like everything is fine

some people like me mock you and wonder\"what happened to mine\"

please dont be offended by what i write

if you are one of those people that is guilty imagine a 5 year old girl layin her bed crying because what happened late that night

my whole life has been nothing but a nightmare

i guess life isnt always fair...

ive been tossed around from one home to another fake women trying to be my mothers

not understanding why i lost 10lbs in one week they didnt see me dying on the inside because i was seperated from my sister and brothers

they were my life each other was all we had

i was angry i still am at 17 years old at my abusive meth addict mom and dad

this year i nearly died i almost killed myself i overdosed on the pills that they were already shovin down my throat

after it was too late i knew it was stupid so i held on to my life even as i was beginning to float

my adoptive mother i told her what i did after i overdosed she got mad and told me to go back to bed

ever since then i knew for her it would have been a blessing to find me dead

my insides are screaming my heart is cold

my life is crap and i for 17 i feel so old

this is my life or atleast a little bit of it..........