My Life

Of all the times in my life,
the worst are when i'm alone,
i harm myself to make me better,
and then i feel at home.

I sit and stare at these four walls,
and think about life,
i realise that cuts release me,
from all this pain and strife.

I used to let my pain build up,
until it got too much to bare,
so i started with the cutting,
because i felt life wasn't fair.

Each day that i am living,
is a constant strain,
and my only way of coping,
is to watch my blood drain.

At first you don't feel it,
when the cuts are being made,
but once the pain starts,
is when the blood begins to fade.

The pain becomes unbearable,
and my limbs begin to burn,
but i know it will be worth it all,
because the pain has made me learn.

One thing i do know is,
that everything will be fine,
as long as i always carry,
this little blade of mine.

My mind tells me it's right,
but my heart won't say the same,
so i listen to my thoughts,
and my scars make me ashamed.

Deep down i know it isn't right,
but i can't battle through,
i know i can't continue,
but stopping's just too hard to do.