Many Things You Don't Understand

Many Things You Don't Understand

If you don’t really understand this poem, it's about my ex Jesse passing away on our 4-month mark.

In Memory of Jesse Heaston; year of 2006.

In the places of my eyes,
There's so much to see,
Just glancing once,
Won't let you see who I really am.

You haven't fond the box,
That holds my heartaches,
Of the coffin that holds,
All the lies of when I say, "I'm OK."

You don't see and you don't understand,
The prison I'm trapped in,
The things I've seen,
And the words I hear.

Maybe if you look deep enough inside,
You'll find the movie,
That I used to play so long ago,
Of when I was happy.

I yearn to find what,
Once made me so happy,
But it's been so long ago,
I cannot remember anymore.

Was it once upon a time ago,
When he could make me smile,
And we'd laugh about the small things,
But where did it all go?

Am I finally realizing,
That he's not standing here,
And I'm just grasping air,
In front of me?

He passed away,
That night of our 4-month mark,
Said our "good-byes" that night,
Only for him to never return.

First time anyone's told me,
They loved me,
First time anyone's told me,
I changed them in so many good ways,
First time in a year,
I finally forced myself to move on,
And yet to find someone at my doorstep.