Rescue Me

by BrokenREALiTy   Apr 19, 2007


I'm drowning,
Lost in a world of seas.
Cold is all I feel right now,
Coming with the light summer breeze.

I'm calling out,
Reaching up into the sand.
Entering the world,
Of a lost and foreign land.

I grab my chest,
But nothing's there.
My heart is missing,
And I'm left bare.

Seeking an answer;
Where am I?
Shoved around and abused,
As people are passing by.

Dazed and confused,
I don't know myself anymore.
Come across a shattered mirror,
Lying broken on the floor.

I see myself,
My reflection cracked.
Blood seeping from the sky,
The whole world gone whacked.

Notice me,
As I reach out grabbing.
Searching for a hand,
To help the struggle that I'm having.

Grasping thin air,
They ignore me completely.
Falling into the world,
RESCUE ME.
[c] 2O07 Mindy Huang

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by xxSnow Angelxx

    Excellent work!!...beautiful work..kept me hooked through out frome the start to the end...u've creatd vivid imagery thru your perfect word choice...good wrk!
    Kp it up!
    xxPoojaxx

  • 16 years ago

    by Zeus

    Another good poem. I loved how imaginative it was. You are a great poet. Keep up the good work. ^_^

  • 16 years ago

    by amoxi

    Very deep and excelently written you had great imagry it was very good keep it up

  • 17 years ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    I see myself,
    My reflection cracked.
    Blood seeping from the sky,
    The whole world gone whacked.

    Notice me,
    As I reach out grabbing.
    Searching for a hand,
    To help the struggle that I'm having.

    ^^^^ Those two verses seem to mess up the flow of the poem, ruining the end. It seems that they need an extra line each to fill up a gap.

    Besides that, the poem, I must admit, was kind of/sort of dull, and it lacked that much emotion, although it proved you are good metaphorically, and that you have a good vocabulary.

    To refrain from breaking your "5.0" streak, i will vote it 5.0 but it's more like a 4 in my book..

    Still, good job.

    5/5
    ~Stephen White

  • 17 years ago

    by SmileeItsBritt

    I like the imagery, nicely done!

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