You Refuse to Love

I look at you
from across the grass
i see you laugh with them
i see you smile
and look at me
but then your smile is ceased

you dont see me
you dont hear me
not in real life
on msn
and on the phone
you are my best mate
but when you are
around all them
i am not here at all

i love you and i have
for longer than you know
our past relationship
ended
but my love for you only grows

i dont know what it is
about you and you weird self
you have so many
different moods
that its hard for me to keep up

you'll talk to me
and call me your friend
and we will have so much fun
but when it comes
right down to it
it is really nothing at all

you say that you feel for me
you ask me to take of my shirt
i say no
because i know
it will only end in hurt

my best friend you did date
and while you did
you asked me to do explicit things
this made me wonder
did you do this
while i was dating you?

the hurt that wrenches my heart
and grips the center of my soul
can not be explained
as it is to hard to put into words
the despise you show me
and then the love you give
the care you offer
and then the insults you throw

my heart twists and changes
and all the while
i am left here to hold on
it doesn't matter to you
if i am behind you or in front
because you think that you own us

not just me
but all the girls you know
you twist and bend and shape them
playing with our hearts
until everything we have
falls apart

because of your cruelty
and you selfish dirty thoughts
how you only want pleasure
and nothing more
you care not for us at all
just our bodies
we are objects to you
and now i see how it truly is

but somehow,
i still love you
need you
and crave to feel your arms around me
what is this power
you posses over us

please tell me
as i sit everyday in pain
pain as you refuse to love
and refuse to treat us,
like we have a heart