Thoughts

Staring into the array of colors
not knowing whether its black or white
trying hard not to cry
putting up a desperate fight
grabbing onto imaginary things
not knowing-or caring
about all of the pain that it brings
screaming out your name
but you don't seem to be there
but who am i trying to fool?
you never are; you don't care
tears streaming down
hatred starting to arise
but i hold it back
i say i love you; but you wont say it back
i cant even fake a smile; i only frown
emptiness-thats all i feel
numb and emotionless
i thought you were different
i thought you were true
but baby why don't you love me;
just as much as i love you?