Not okay

by Lost & Delirious   May 9, 2007


Door shut,
Lights out.
The beating heart longs to stop,
As the impatient waves come through.
Thunder cracks the smooth shell,
Revealing the trembling creature inside.
She knew it was there,
The suffocating solitude
Covered by that fragile smile.
Alone she stands,
Alone she drowns.
Not a secret anymore,
Not a secret in the dark.
She's not okay.

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by dollwithafrown

    I really like how you compared this person's feelings to objects of the ocean (waves, shell, creatures). They made this all the more easier to picture in my head.

    It was a simple poem, yet will written. Good job.

  • 16 years ago

    by Tara

    Wow amazing poem....just beautiful and moving and touching...simple and powerful

    ----tara

  • 16 years ago

    by BECCA lessTHANthree

    Wonderful poem.. very simple words but still the ending was strong.. also you described everything really well.. great job :D

  • 16 years ago

    by KeyxMashingxParody

    I always say the shorter the poem the stronger it should be. Well done! 5/5

    -Liz-

  • 16 years ago

    by Vanessa

    Beautifully written dark poem. the word choice was excellent dripping with emtions, the flow was great the imagery vivid and the message was clear. 5/5

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