Uncontrollable

I sit here as my world falls apart,
As they carelessly tear at my heart.

I wonder why im so alone in this,
How could I be the only one?
Ive done nothing wrong.
If anyone has any clue,
Please tell me what should I do?

The ear piercing screams
Of tortured souls,
Your killing people one bye one,
Was that your goal?

The scars on my wrist
Tell my past,
Nothings ever fair,
But please dont act like you ever cared

Leave me here like you did before,
Leaving my body to rot to its core.
Im trying to be strong,
But wondering what for.

The explosion of bombs,
Tear apart my life,
Leaving behind my reckless dreams,
Wishes that will never come true,
Tell me what does all this mean to you?

This has happened all before,
Once im my past it left an dark open door.
I dont have enough strength to do this time and time again.
Im wondering if I should just give up,
For I have far too much sin.

So familiar, all same.
My tormented life no one can tame.

My friends became strangers,
My family became the abusers,
I became something far beyond myself,
I cry everyday wondering if I Can over come this.

Can I change?

The razor became my best friend always there to take the pain away.
My tears became my release.
Searching over the screams lurking for some peace.

The screams,
The blood,
The bombs,
The shattered heart,
The tormented thoughts,
All tore my life apart.

Im sitting here screaming in pain,
My life fading away,
Wishing you would care.
Silently, Dreaming for a better day.