Fck up

I'll sit here and cry
and you know I'm crying
but still you don't pick up
i look around
yet i still can't see
everything is dark
as i sit on my bed
legs crossed
with the lights off
tears rolling down my checks
i think to myself
i think i fcked up
what if i just end it
cut my life short
it'll be over
no more pain
it's gotten to much
so I'll just say goodbye
good bye to the one i love
but because of me she Crys
because of me she wants to die
maybe she'll be better off
with out me in her life
making things worse
could i do it
leave her behind
I'm not sure i could
it just breaks my heart to see what I'm doing to her
i hate myself for it
I'll never forgive myself
maybe I'm not worth it
maybe I'm a waste of space
but could i really say good bye?