The Walls

All She has to say
Is get downstairs,
And my heart goes wild,
Wild with fear.

I walk down the stairs,
Stairs that lead to pain.
These stairs have marks in them
Marks deeper than a scratch.

I try to remain calm,
Calm is not a word.
Not a word I could accomplish.
Not when She was around.

I want out of this God,
Out of this anguish, this pain.
But not even God can hear,
Hear what happens downstairs.

The walls are the only ones,
That know my secrets.
Because they listen
Listen, as I talk to them.

Dawn is nearing now.
Dawn...all the colors.
Red...the color of brick.
Red...the color of blood.

I hear Her steps.
As She creeps down the stairs.
I ready myself for the pain.
The pain, only She can bring.

She enters the basement.
And a blanket of darkness hides her face.
Her face that holds a smile,
A smile, not from happiness.

Her steps get closer,
And I can smell her breath.
Her breath that has been the same.
Since I was born.

God, are you sleeping?
Maybe God hates me too.
Hates me because I talk to the Walls,
More than I talk to him.

She stares at me with those eyes,
Eyes that once looked like mine.
But now they have changed
And are bearing into my soul.

A tear slips out,
Out from my swollen eyes,
As she pushes me again,
And again into the Walls.

I try to figure out,
Who this person really is.
Maybe there is a nicer person,
Underneath Her mask.

I close my eyes,
Eyes that have seen so much,
Much more than a normal kid.
Much more than a normal person.

What was it like before,
Before I was ever born?
Who did she hurt then?
Only the Walls know.

She moves closer to me.
Why me? What did I do?
I back into the Walls.
Walls that now prevent me from leaving.

She shoves me playfully.
Like when we used to play Monopoly.
But now I am the one,
The one that goes to jail.

I know what comes next,
A violent shove into the Walls.
The Walls that are my journal.
My journal, no one can ever read.

I reach for something,
Something to keep me standing,
Before I fall.
Fall into the arms of fate.

I reach out for the Walls,
The Walls are damp.
Damp with tears.
Maybe the Walls are crying,
Crying with me.