Poem of pain

Poem of pain*
Damn how to start? Damn its been a minute since I picked up dAt dirty blade and I thank god for making sure I didnt; but once again I'm here thinking should I? I'm trying to make a freaking dollar out of 50 cents; some people ask why we crazy and I freaking blame you for creating my cousin into a crack baby...
There nothing else to do when those tears are falling free from mine and your eyes; I'm not living in dHa past when I got the words tattooed on my chest, my destiny is well; my future is shyt; damn so many freaking year so many freaking tears and all you say is chula dont cry; put yourself in my shoes and then tell me damn I got to find a way to survive because like I said before they win when your sould dies.....
Damn only 12 years old rasing five kids by herself and sometime she sits in her room and crys trying to find the blade but once more the blade falls and slits her wrists; so beautiful; young and pretty yet she's ashamed and her heart is fulled with such hate; do I rest my case? Or should I countine spitting the words dAt formed this poem are words said in dHa back of my hand; because you see I got talent and I aint afraid to showit because I aint nobody to stay quiet I'm freaking 12 with five kids locked down for life; matthew; melyssa; jermey; krystal and kevin are my life any person try to take them away that's a freaking bullet going threw their brain; then they'll feel my pain; I "f" the world because I'm cursed people stealing girl's purse.... "f" what you heard dude say what you got to say because this is my poem of pain