Welcome to Hell

No matter how much i eat i will always be starving, no matter how much i sleep i will always be tired, i wish i could explain my depression to you but you seem so wired.
No matter how much i laugh i still want to cry, no matter how much i live they still had to die.
Why did this happen this isn't fair, no words can explain this pain i bare.
I hang on for dear life when i need to let go, but I'll always smile you'll never know.
You don't know how i feel because you have the perfect soul, untouched, unharmed, loved, a heart not made of coal.
The knife my only friend that doesn't talk back, it doesn't make fun of me for all of the things that i lack.
It does the job i want it to do, i have control over me thats true.
The blood trickles down being my tears, but still i have the urge to cry, maybe it would be better if i would just die.
Would i join my friends and family above, or go straight to hell for i was the only one i didn't love?
I see it flash before my eyes, the blackness swallows me whole, I'm now in hell and forever it has my soul.
The silence piercing my ears and i see creatures wrapped up in chains, it is their hatred of living their life unforgivable vain.
They show no emotion, their eyes red with fire,
I wish to go home, its my only desire.
I've chosen the knife my so called friend,
now I'll be in hell until the world ends.
It takes over innocent children, corrupts young teens,
making them take the knife is their only theme.
I want to stop it i want them to live,
but if i do the devil will never forgive.
I feel their anguish, i know their fears,
I wish i could help them those poor innocent dears.
This isn't right i don't want this hell!
I'm beaten raw and to the ground i fell.
If i could only take it back if i could only see my mistakes,
But imagining this things would only be fake.
I look up and hear the last bell,
The people around me shout WELCOME TO HELL!