* Title Contest *

Thanks Krisitan!
I know it gets more exciting...

4 more days everyone.

I am excited too! :)

Sky Engraved in Song

by Ms Sunshine

I'm on the verge of falling again
into the bottom of failing arms,
overpowered by weakness I
feel like releasing the last
breath of hope that I no
longer bear inside of me.

I want to fall back, untie my
emotions and tears into
thunders and rainfalls
to watch the clouds jazz for
my loss, to fall on my back
stare at the sky chanting my
farewell, I can see me dazzled
by the stunned golden stripes
up in the heart of the blue
as I smile like I dare to.

There might be nothing like
listening to the cry of my
departure, as I fall back to
the earth of my failures.

Rania Moallem

9 POEMS RECEIVED! ^ thanks Rania!

TODAY IS CLOSING DATE, I AM WAITING TIL END OF DAY SO PLEASE GET REST IN IF YOU CAN ( I think only 3 poets)

Thanks for participating!
MaryAnne

On the Broken Train

Clickety Clack Clack
I'm on this train again,
moving forward with no stopping
speeding faster, farther
gaining momentum.
I am stuck, with no way off

Rickety Rack Rack
the wooden stakes we drive upon
are rotten and dying,
Drive one through my heart,
it wont be the first time.
Just like I, everything is falling apart

Smickety Smack Smack
lurching has caused me to fall,
collision of my head to something hard
I feel the pain, but that is normal
dizziness overwhelming
Ill say hello to the fetal position. Tears.

Lickety Lack Lack
Everything is missing
just I and the floor of this monster
crawl to the edge and peer over
the rails taunt me with their speech
"You are broken, not I"

Clickety Clack Clack
Loss of air in my lungs, suffoctaing
knuckles spill crimson as they hold tight
It would be so easy to let go.
just jump off this train called Life
let it continue on without me.

Bickety Back Back
Cannot fall into the past,
we left if at the last station,
just hold on tight to this broken train
allow tears to blow away in the wind
Maybe one day it will stop.

^ Thanks for your quicky entry Jessie :) I appreciate it!

10 POEMS IN
THiS WILL NOW BE CLOSED.

I will judge tomorrow and results posted at end of day. Thanks everyone!

Does anybody mind if I give another day for results?

I read over all entries once but feel I cannot make a solid decision yet, I don't want to do anything I might regret by reading again.

Thanks for your patience!
God bless!

Sure, Anne, take your time, dear. :)

Take all the time you need

Yes MaryAnne.

Actually, I changed the results of my contest 3 times before I managed to take the final, can't-be-discussed decision!

And that was because I read all the top poems more than once to grasp the last drop of the meaning!

TAKE YOUR TIME.. ;)

I think Abed is trying to say: no pressure!

;-)

Haha :p YES!

It was a pleasure being in ur contest so feel free to take all the time u need :) it was fun :) :) and best of luck to everyone u were all really great :)

Thanks for all being such eager participants and good sports!
I appreciate you!

WINNERS ANNOUNCED!

1st.
Noura (The Poetess)
with Maple Leaves of Tomorrow.

2nd.
The Godfather
with Sky engraved in Song

3rd.
Ms. Sunshine
with Sky Engraved in Song.

3rd.
Lebanese Phoenix
with On the Broken Train (the Leap).

I do realize 3rd is a tie but they both impacted me in such immense ways. I will probably post reviews tonight after getting the great idea from Lebanese Phoenix (hope you don't mind),, as I want to let you know how each poem did bring inspiration.

CONGRATULATIONS! Please pm me the poems you wish me to read/rate/comment and I will do my very best.

Thanks for your patience and being awesome writers! Reviews posted shortly.

Well, thanks for the place & congratulation to Noura, Rania & Abed

Well run contest, MaryAnne. I hope it will not be your last.

Ya us!! :D

Congrats Noura, Rania, Me, and Larry :)

Btw, MaryAnee we're siblings, and you can do whatever you wanttt!!!

:D

Yay! thank you, MarryAnne!
:):)

Didn't expect this, haha.
Congrats Sir Larry! Abed!! I'm so happy for you all....And Rania..your piece was so sad.

MarryAnne, promise us you will come up soon with an amazing contest like this, ok? :)

Thank you Mr.Chamberlin, Abed, and Noura for your encouragement! Hope to always read more of your work and I am inspired to make another contest. Hope you do too :)

FIRST FIVE REVIEWS: (in order of entries received)

Thirty seconds for change
by: Soft Parade

I loved the essence of the rhyme in this piece, I felt it brought about a bit of mystery. The lines that were the most thought-engaging to me were "Navigate your imagination, your ideas are illumination". There was a lot to be discovered in this piece I felt, although I knew not about the situation or subject, I still feel that search for the awaiting truth and the possibility of finding you among life. Very intriguing though.

Sky engraved in song
By: Larry Chamberlin (The Godfather)

The reason I chose this piece out of your other one was because of the intense emotions that you gave everything for in your poem. The opening grabbed at my heart- to ponder back to that memory, perhaps you should have held on more? You introduce this background of song so beautifully and with a gentle flow-the ending sings of a misery made solo, and your ideas came across artistically and with great sadness.

On the Broken Train
(The Leap)
By: Lebanese Phoenix

The strongest point I found in this poem was how you delivered your voice to the reader. It was passionate & well thought out and the scene is painted with vivid descriptions. I felt myself wondering about this girl, her motives, her appearance, and the history of her scars, and you leave me with concern for her. The whole trap of forcing her to marry and undergoing two abortions is completely heartbreaking to watch someone lose a part of themselves like that. The ending struck me and became the strength for the reader- making an individual decision, choosing to end suffering- and yet escaping life. Taking that leap-.very dramatic and personal.

Silk Ribbons Of The Wind"
By: kristian Bisig

I love your unique touch of these "silk ribbons" that captivate the reader in some sort of enchantment- some sort of magic. I like how you mentioned "fireflies" and how they "kiss your face", while I am still left pondering about the mystery of these ribbons in the wind. An enchanting piece- I was a bit unsure about repeating"silk ribbons" so often, because your descriptions were strong enough, it took away from the strength.

Maple leaves of tomorrow
By: Larry Chamberlin (The Godfather)

I didn't know at first, that this was about diabetes.it is worth more than a few reads and every time invokes that wisdom and thought (where I am actually nodding in awe). Your fourth stanza is the stanza that I remembered the most, keeping too much of something and over-using its beauty makes you miss out on so much. A touching voice and an incredible message founding it I can learn from.

Thanks for the review :D

:/ I don't see my poem up there! :(

Here are the rest guys :) thanks for waiting.
Please send me messages about what poems you want commented.
Noura- you get 7 comments/
Godfather- got your 5 titles already
Abed- you get 3 comments/
Rania- you get 3 comments/

Beach Butterflies & Sand Prints
(Whimsical Foam of Beirut)
by: Lebanese Phoenix

The imagery here was soothing and I found a beautiful pride here to the capital of the country you love. The whole atmosphere you have created is pure, and the stuff dreams are certainly made of! The ending was like taking my breath away where you elude to memories turning into a memorable history. "I lay upon a bed of golden roses"- beautiful flow and imaginative verse that brings many to where you are. Very enjoyable!

Mystery on Golden Avenue
by: Noura (The Poetess)

The opening was really different- the use of "embarrassment" gave me that feel that you've been holding this shame for a long time. This poem is really vivid "wind abducting me" and "sanity calling out your name" were profound revelations about this character. The lines kept getting stronger and I was drawn into this passion's tide. The only part I felt weak was a bit more weak was "then...we hug"- I felt the build up and then declining of this glorious moment you have thought of....... but felt it could have been written more elegantly without giving away the fact that the kiss was just a hug? Maybe, just my opinion dear...the ending was a bit mystifying, I liked the concept of it. Great thought I still can think of.

Maple Leaves of Tomorrow
By : Noura Hatem
(The Poetess)

This was the winning piece Noura, because it brought so much new meaning to the title and the character. This whole inner struggle between what your soul is wanting to forget and what you have seen through his failure, but you meet him only for a moment. Your phrases had class, flow and made this piece your own! The parenthesis, especially the ending of "liberate me", left me speechless- two words= profoundness. Like you have been left solo and his very existence takes away everything else you could live for. Good question words- eccentric and a fresh thought. Greatly intriguing with unique emotions that ride this poem.

Sky Engraved in Song
by Ms Sunshine

This poem felt to me like breaking through that wall between wanting and what
you are really held back from doing. The ending was like a huge reality crash and it left me wondering how to win over these failures. The scene "untie my emotions and tears into thunders and rainfalls" is like letting go and finding yourself again. A heartbreaking piece, making me crave for freedom. Only suggestion would be the line breaks were (only to me though) not flowing as well as they could have, I personally think the structure could be stronger, but the content speaks louder¦it holds nothing back. An emotional, tearing write.

On the Broken Train
By: Jessie

The suspense definitely builds in this piece and the battle of your heart is so clear here- the ending was the most memorable, as you ponder about letting go of the
Train of Life- letting it go while you fall again. That ending line I did like- it was simple but stated that tomorrow could bring anything, as you keep holding on, moving forward, it tears you up even more, but there might be a way to let the pain go. Not to sure I liked the beginning lines that much, it was a clever idea to insert the "sound" into this scene, but they were the same and didn't necessarily gain much creativity in the poem itself. Still, a beautiful, painful write you express well.

Thank you and congratulations winners u were tough commpition and everyone was great :) :)

Thank you! and well done and well deserved, i enjoyed the titles and writing the poem!

Thanksssss xD
the reviews were honest and brilliant, MarryAnne. :)

<333

Incredibly well run contest, thanks for the review:)