Drunk/drugs/stab/death

I remember that smile..aww its the only thing that does not feel me with pain.Your eyes tell me a story, a story of a boy who has been hurt all of his life, You do not like to open up to people cause you don't want them to feel bad for you,You don't want them to go tell other people what your going through!
I remember the day you walked through that big flaky door, with the black door knob, and the little design on it,i remember the look in your eyes...aww it was a terrible feeling for me!
I remember what you looked like...
your eyes were painted black,your lip was busted,the inside of your lip had stitches,you had this big bruise on your right arm,but you still had this smile on your face..my eyes filled up with tears..
Then you sat next to me,you leaned over toward me and told me don't cry,don't feel bad this always happens to you!! "What" i replied
"you know that i get beat,you can tell thats why you look as if your going to cry"
"i want to but i cant,i don't want to feel bad,but i do,i don't want anything bad to happen..i mean it has already happened to you....
I remember your face..omg your face...your big green eyes...the black ring around them..your lip...it was pink..no red...dark red...looks like dried up blood...
WOW you look really effed up..."my dad is an alcoholic...my mom is a druggie...every night my dad goes out and gets drunk..my mom is passed out on the couch..they don't believe in god..they don't want me to go to church they don't me to do anything with him...i talk to him to help me out...my dad comes home drunk..my mom gets high in the room than passes out in the living room...when he gets home i get in his way..i always get hit..i get beat then my mom wakes up and tries to help than one day he hit her and pushed her over the couch..she fell back wards and hit her head..i went crazy got a knife and stabbed him in his leg"
"Why would you do that?"
"i love my mom and i don't want her to die..i don't want him to kill her... i want her to stay alive even if that means i die..."
This goes on for a few more months than one day you did not come to school!!!!

I get a call saying your dead...your not here any more....I'm the only one you ever told this too....

My world is black and gray..everyday in that classroom i look to the left of me...i wait...and...wait but still your not here..i want to cry but....

I remember you telling me to stay strong and don't ever cry for you...

When I'm sad i remember your smile