Awash

by Melissa   Mar 13, 2009


It was a gradual unfolding,
the listless dimming of love

perhaps it shone golden
at birth,
but the seasons
proved glum,
blustering downpours
flooded my chest
with stormy water

and I've become immune to hugs

I saw love yesterday
down by the puddle of rue,
we spoke awkwardly
about movies
and this downhearted weather,
but nothing about why
love left me here

to sink

3


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Latest Comments

  • 8 years ago

    by Knee

    A definite-deserved-winning poem !

    blustering downpours
    flooded my chest
    with stormy water

    This part was very intelligently written, truly loved the imagination put here.

    The last part made me go like wow..this poem is such a great inspiration at the end.
    Very well done Mel
    Write on !

  • 8 years ago

    by Nicko

    A lovely piece well worth the read, wonderfully constructed with clever word usage. I've read a lot of poems that have won on the front page, yours is more deserving than most. I disagree with The Tasteless regarding your over emphasis of the word "love" in the second line, to me it gives focus to your piece and draws the reader in to the atmosphere and the poems intent. Well done

    Nick

  • 8 years ago

    by Lu

    Congrats Melissa, well deserved win !

  • 8 years ago

    by Aureus Argentum

    This is really beautiful, Melissa. :) I loved how you formed it. :)

    Congratulations on the win.

    5/5

    Bri~

  • 8 years ago

    by Lonely Rider

    Awesome write ... the ending stanza left me speechless ... its so powerful ... loved the personification of love...

    "but nothing about why
    love left me here

    to sink "

    ^^ brilliant ending ... the last line itself expressed all the emotions ...