Truth cannot hide

by A lonely soul   Jan 19, 2011


One can run but not hide
from the people one fears
or is it one's own true fears ?
When one has something to hide
from someone who can tell
what is behind their eyes
it is even difficult to smile
without giving their thoughts away

One can stay quiet with eyes closed
and lips sealed
but for how long ?
Will it even work to dodge
the will which wants to give away
what is in one's heart

What if there was a way
to mend the broken heart
without even leaving a scar
or a drop of tear
or hurting someone
near and dear

What if their is a way
to mend the hurt of not one but
two souls lost in their own way?
Would one consider the cure
or does one want to live
with a broken heart for ever ?

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Latest Comments

  • 6 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Truth does always have a way of coming out one way or the other for it cannot stay hidden for long..and if there is one who can read everything about you from just seeing your eyes..then truly nothivg can hide. I liked this read it makes the reader to think :)

  • 6 years ago

    by L

    Yup, this its better. ^_^
    Thank you for responding to my inquiries.

  • 6 years ago

    by A lonely soul

    Author's response to above:

    Appreciate your thoughts and suggestions. Here are some explanations:

    1) Yes more stanza's are possible, but may change the sentiments behind each stanza. But, may be the second stanza can be split up. I will give it a try.
    2)Re: And the fear instead of fears would sound better.
    Fears is intentional and also goes along with fears in the next lineRe with the next line.
    Re:
    I think "our or their" sounds better than one's.
    This is written in first person for a specific person and hence "their" will not fit in and may alter the thought.
    The same applies to "may be it will sound better if you add Their before eyes and lips."
    Hence "one or ones" is correctly used.
    3)Re: I didn't understand this part:
    Will it even work to dodge
    the will which wants to give away
    what is in one's heart
    I think if you take the 3rd line here, it does explain the content of the first 2 lines.
    4)What if their is a way
    to mend the hurt of not one but
    two souls lost in their own way?

    Re:This is making me think but i'm not understanding what you mean.. The way I think is like if its possible to help two souls that are hurt by introducing them and them helping each other.
    Comment:So the expression here is deep and hidden for 2 people who love each other in slightly different ways, but misunderstand each other.
    5)Would one consider the cure
    or does one want to live
    with a broken heart for ever ?

    Re:^ Will anyone consider the cure.
    Or does everyone want to live
    with a broken heart for ever?

    Commentt: "anyone" and "everyone" will substantially change the mening behind this stanza, for the same reason as given in #2 - this is written in first person for a specific person.

    Great thoughts and suggestions, if the poem was written in third person.
    I truly appreciate your comments.

  • 6 years ago

    by L

    ^I think it will look better if you separate the poem into more stanzas. May be ending some stanzas right after a question.

    One can run but not hide
    from the people one fears ( fear)
    or is it from one's (their) own true fears ?

    ^ And the fear instead of fears would sound better.
    I think "our or their" sounds better than one's.

    When one has something to hide
    from someone who can tell
    what is behind their eyes,
    it is even difficult to smile
    without giving their thoughts away?

    One can stay quiet
    with (their) eyes closed
    and (their) lips sealed
    but for how long ?

    ^ may be it will sound better if you add Their before eyes and lips.

    Will it even work to dodge > I didn't understand this part.
    the will which wants to give away?

    what is in one's heart?

    What if there was a way
    to mend the broken heart
    without even leaving a scar
    or a drop of tear
    or hurting someone
    near and dear.?

    ^ my favorite part

    What if their is a way
    to mend the hurt of not one but
    two souls lost in their own way?

    ^ This is making me think but i'm not understanding what you mean.. The way I think is like if its possible to help two souls that are hurt by introducing them and them helping each other.

    Would one consider the cure
    or does one want to live
    with a broken heart for ever ?

    ^ Will anyone consider the cure.
    Or does everyone want to live
    with a broken heart for ever?

  • 7 years ago

    by bella

    It's very good actually perhap's many can refer to this.. Keep up the work friend...