Years had passed since the sun
dusked on the kids we were, we
shared a childhood but that was
all there was to hold. Memories
had evanesced and so did he.
The slithering blood in his veins
had only spun in webs of delusion
for I was not marked to become his
destiny nor to be his non-curable
And he never stopped haunting
the steps of yesterday...
The chilly breeze I felt against
my neck, the numbness of my
breaths, the darkness widening
in my eyes were all signs to his
He had escorted the ghosts
and walked alongside the
faceless reflections. And he
became a darker shadow
among the shadows, never
resembling the known, a
result of obstruction that I
only was able to see.
Oh meme... what are you doing lately?? I haven't really been reading much poems of late and when I come round to yours I feel really connected to them and what you are writing about. I felt this poem slightly related to the same person from your other poem, or maybe that is just me picking up on my own feelings about it.
What I really liked was how the first stanza was quite sad, touching and did make me wonder if I read the category as correctly being dark but then as I read on I got exactly why you placed it here and found it a very interesting angle to take the poem.
I think you done well to show what this person has done to you and how their presence is known to you in a way no one else can relate to.
Your ending is really powerful and makes the reader want to know more about the two characters and why they are not together and even what the other person is thinking or feeling. Has this all been the mind of insecurities from one side, or have they indeed been distant and absent. So many roads to take fro this poem.
I love the title, but you have a small typo, it's "dysfunctional". From the title alone, I automatically think of a dysfunctional, controlling relationship.
First stanza: He was a childhood friend, possibly a young 'boyfriend' ... if you can call it that when you are kids, lol. But he disappeared and with time so did the memories.
Second stanza: This is where the story becomes creepy, like he's absolutely obsessed with you... makes me think of a crazy delusional man who 'thinks' they are madly in love, but in reality they aren't even friends. You wasn't meant to be with him, but HE thinks you are perfect together... I love the use of 'non-curable obsession' ... it definitely sets off that stalker vibe. Just from this piece alone he sounds bat-shit crazy! LOL Beware! should be tattooed on his forehead! haha, omg I'm a little slap happy right now, excuse my randomness :P
Third stanza: He seems to always be around, whether it's reality or in your dreams maybe. I love the whole wording of this line.
The rest of this stanza gave me absolute chills! I read the 'chilly breeze' as him breathing down your neck, but it was chilly because your veins ran cold and ultimately became numb due to fear. Eeeek, I gotta quit reading that, I keep looking behind me.. haha.
Ending: So, he is a ghost? or he feels like a ghost because he's always there, yet you never truly see him? His presence is just always felt no matter where you go.
Love reading some dark from you! Write more dark, you are lovely at it. :)