Trooper, Mr. Detective

Am I who others say I am?

You don't know my real name
I never gave it to you
but I know yours

How I only found out
afterwards
that you worked in
law enforcement for
sixteen years

Is that why I whispered
that I feel safe with you?

But everything I felt
in the moment
was not meant to last
it wouldn't become my
reality

I knew that
when I let you take me
to your semi truck

I knew that
when I told you that you
were a good man
why were you not
married now?

I had it all wrong
I knew that

I knew that

and still I believed that
you were too good for me

even though real love
doesn't dodge in between
lust

even though real love
would never play dirty
like the clouds on December's
first meltdown

-
Freewriting on a Saturday afternoon