I'm Not Enough to You

by Alex Penuelas   May 26, 2017


I don't quite
Understand what I
Am not doing
Enough of.

I'm a decent kid,
I don't go out
And spend all my
Hard earned money
On drugs or on other
Self-destructive devices.

I don't go out
And cause trouble
Anywhere that I go.

I give a lot to you
And to the rest of
Our family,
Be it time or money.

I'm doing good
At the job I'm at,
Getting appraisal after appraisal
From my supervisors.

And I'm trying
My hardest to
Get myself back
Into shape like I
Used to be many
Years ago.

I'm trying to get
Better by the day.
I really am.

But No,
That isn't enough for You,
Is It?

You want me to
Already be a graduate,
Already want me to have
A full time 6 figure salary,
Already want me to
Look like Arnold Schwarzenegger.

You want all this done now,
Because you think I've been taking
Way too long at
Accomplishing these things.

And Yes,
You're right,
I have been taking long.

But dammit I'm trying my best.

I'm trying with
Every fiber
In my being
To prove to you
That i am worth your love,
That I am worth your time,
That i am worth all of the
Things you have sacrificed.

I'm trying,
I really am,
But to you,
Trying isn't good enough.

I'm not enough for you,
And I'm sorry.

2


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Latest Comments

  • 8 months ago

    by BlueJay

    While I appreciate this piece I do not feel as though it should be nominated. It is more of a venting rant than a piece of art. The style does not have too much personality and the wording is far too plain for my tastes. But I do hope to see more of your wonderful work reaching the honorable mentions or front page soon.

  • 8 months ago

    by Ren

    Wow this is such a strong and emotional piece! My eyes and heart hung on every word...even after the tenth time reading it. What an extremely powerful write. Living up to the expectations of others-especially loved ones- is so overwhelming, and at times, very disheartening. It's like you want to make them proud of you and your accomplishments...but then again your heart and soul long for something else...or like you mentioned in your poem, you feel you can't succeed fast enough to please them. It's hard to try and please others and still fulfill your own goals...but ultimately it all comes down to your happiness and whether you truly feel you are following the right path for you in that moment in time. Sometimes we have to be selfish and focus on ourselves and what we truly want out of life- whether our actions be approved by others or not. Judgement is inevitable, but learning to keep your chin up through it all and let it slide off your shoulders is possible :) Be yourself and follow your heart. Love and accept yourself unconditionally for who you are, at this moment. Go at your own pace, believe you can succeed (you will), and keep on keepin on :) much love and peace to you, and once again, well done on an excellent write!

  • 8 months ago

    by mossgirl19

    Hey! Wow, I have been in the same boat! I feel you. Just be yourself and accept who you are, your pace, your timings. Your labor will not be in vain so keep going. Nice piece!