Sometimes my mind wanders after a young night’s passion
especially when undecided between writing a 4am poem
about going through hell over ghosts of times forgotten
or a lullaby about the storms within my sarah marie.
It is a powerful spellbound ambivalence when I'm with you:
often I am afraid you bear the full weight of this love
because falling in love with you was like falling asleep
while I am the unlovable orphan boy numb with envy.
When I have news of ‘out there’ during my recovery I hear
in far away places people deceive and abuse each other,
machines fail from metal fatigue while mountains turn to dust,
and there is a dark tower closing bodies into eternal anguish.
Yet it is heavenly here where you know my name
and even though I'm tired in truth know that I'm fine.
Wrapping it up, in the forest, she is free - our own Eden,
and she have shown me forbidden joys of the apple tree.