A dream no more

by Marjan   Oct 16, 2006


With water colors,
I drew a greenish castle.
My teacher said
No castle's green.
And handed me "brown".
"brown" flew,
Covered
My dream of a castle so green.

My flawed drawing
Became
Severely perfect,
Torn,
No longer a dream.

Years passed
As the pitter-patter of seconds
Came down dancing
Upon the ruins of my dream
bearing my tune
no more.

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by Arun Khan

    5 / 5 !!! REALLY NICE

  • 18 years ago

    by Mr M

    Beautifully written. I loved the way you illustrated how others tend to destroy our dreams.

  • 18 years ago

    by Neo Castelino

    I like dis.....

  • 18 years ago

    by David

    Ok i suggest just one thing. you need to incorporate a few more words per line. just to give it more meaning and effect.

    but this is still very very stunning.

    5 from me. i will read more tomorrow.

    David

  • 18 years ago

    by ChevyCowgirl23

    Gurlie i miss your poems!!!!!!!! i love your work!
    Amanda

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