I'm broken into pieces that I will never get back.
As tender and sore as my heart was you let me cry.
I wish I left you before I was turned into nothing.
But now that you're not in my life my smile doesn't lie.
And it sucks how you didn't care at all what I felt.
My eyes cried a river that drowned all of my dreams.
It's amazing how I stayed for so long with the pain I dealt.
And everything I've been through, live is defiantly not what it seems.
Interesting piece. It is written with raw emotions, straight from the heart which is very effective. I don't read friendship/ family poems often but this one is really written in a good way.
In this line:
--As tender and sore as my heart was you let me cry.--
I don't quite understand the construction "my heart was you let me cry" but I'm not sure what sounds wrong about that.
My other suggestion is to change the word "Sucks" in the fifth line. Maybe it's just me, but it ruins the flow in that line a bit.
All in all, you did truly great job.