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by Beautiful Forever Feb 20, 2008
Love, romance /
I'm so bored, I'm falling asleep,
This teacher is boring,
My thoughts can't even creep,
Pretty soon I'll be snoring,
[Pass it to her]
I'd have to agree (with a smile),
This class just drags on,
I would rather sleep for awhile,
Instead of waking up at dawn,
[Pass it to him]
Your smile made my heart ignite,
It was such a beautiful sight,
Now I'm more awake than ever,
How about you? (trying to be clever),
[Throw it to her]
You're cute, and so sweet,
But you should try to be more discreet,
If the teacher sees, we'll get caught,
Although it is an exciting thought,
[Kick it across the floor to him]
Forget being discreet, I want you,
Just tell me what I have to do,
You're so beautiful in every way,
And I think I know what to say,
[Walk over and hand it to her]
You're so brave, I'm impressed,
And a bit surprised that you confessed,
And you're so beautiful in every way,
So tell me what you wanted to say,
"I've always wanted, to make you mine"
Man am I gonna get bashed for such a useless use of syllables. "Awww"
Pft, talk about a useless comment.
Okay, seriously though, I like how you're being braver with your use of punctuation here (in comparison to The Diary)~
Braver, and it's working for you. Keep at it, this is great!
5/5, just super.
Wow, this is really a unique piece. *congratulations* Very sweet poem. :D
by Crystal Gaze
This was quite unique. I don't think I have ever read something like this.
I really enjoyed it, and I thought you did a really good job writting it:)
The content was sweet, and the words painted a cute picture.
Haha...exelent poem...good flow and overall good poem...I enjoyed reading this...I acualy wanna read it again
Awww.. this is a really cute and sweet poem... your brain works like magic lol... i would have never thought of coming up with a poem like this...im impressed... the flow was perfect..
theres just one thing... near the middle of the poem i noticed that your rhyming pattern changed..
but i still love it..and thought it was very well written.5/5