Wow, this is really touching. But I just talked to your dad today... Why did you kill your father?!?! lol I'm just kidding. I know how much you love your dad. I think that maybe the last stanza needs a little bit of work, but that's really it. I think it's great.

Touching. This poem truly expresses the familiarity and distance between two very close people. Does that make sense? It's written in letter format, along with all the little absurdities we include in them that doesn't really matter.

The certain joy in the first five stanzas all dissipated as I reached the last two lines. Wonderfully written, conclusion and all. You've very nearly brought tears to my eyes.

"But he's getting old too, you know."
Overshadowing? When I read your poem over again, I thought I senases a little silhouette of deeper emotion here.

This is a very well written love that has made me very emotional

Wow this poem was very emotional. It was filled with love. I was in tears by the end. Keep up the good work.

Oh man. I'm pretty close to crying. I read this out loud, and it's beautiful, and honest, and amazing. You're a strong person, I can tell.

"Mama's been good lately,
She had a bad fall about a year ago
And Richie comes by every day
But he's getting old too, you know."

For some reason this stanza stuck out to me, in a good way. It seemed like part of a real conversation. The whole poem did, of course, but this bit more than anything.

Beautiful just beautiful great job. a work of art it really express ur love for ur father.

My dad didn't die. I just wrote this poem because I don't really know what I'd do if he did die. I don't even want to think about it. Richie is my dad's little brother; he's 2 years younger than my dad. I dunno. I put myself in the future and this is just how I would probably deal with something like that.

Amazing piece of work, keep it up!!!

5/5

Very good poem. It reminds me of the poem that you commented of mine :) and how much of this I'd probably be doing if I do end up moving.

Theres nothing i can think of that needs improvement though =\

5/5

Thanks for the comment :)

I luved it

OMG...what a awesome poem..it's so touching, i felt like a tear run down my cheek by the end of it, keep of the great work 5/5

Wow! i totally didn't see that end coming! amazing!!

Hmm.. actualy i was expecting a different story but i was wrong, nice twist.. kindda lonely, nice flow, and great ending.

This is simply amazing piece... actually the ending makes it even more touching and hearfelt... I read it before but i forgot to comment on it .. :)

after reading the ending .. i read it two more times... it seem so beautiful.. the emotions so beautifully described...

the last verse is certainly my favorite...

excellent write...

I thought it was wonderfly! :))))

This poem was beautiful. It really spoke to me, and brought tears to my eyes. I appreciate this poem.

Wow that poem struck me. I dont have a dad. I havent seen him in 6 years. I hate him with all my heart. nice poem by the way to get me a little rallied up by one is hard.

This poem showed a lot of imagination thankfully that is all it was but the rhyme scheme was perfect and it invoked much emotion

Great poem.

That was so touching. It's like this completely normal conversation and then BAM! You find out all this time you've been talking to his grave. A very touching piece that too many ppl can relate to. Well done with rhyme and the flow was pretty good too!
Enjoyed!
*inthesehearts* 5/5