When i met you

I like one alot better! Awesome job! This is a very sweet one :) Love it...once again...i'm happy to see you put as much as you did into this piece! Great job:)

I've noticed one thing, you express your feelings very well. However, you just kind of slap everything together in one messy paragraph. This one isn't too messy.. but the other poem was kinda messy. There is no real flow, it's more of a free-verse kind of poem. You basically just state things.. rather than having a poem that rhymes or has puncuation and flows beautifully. I think you have the potential to make it more oh.. poetically.. but you just choose not to. I know a lot of people on this site that write like you do. They express their feelings so well, but the 'poem' isn't really a poem, it lacks stanzas.. word-choice...puncuation..and other things you would consider poetic. If you are just a beginner at this whole poetry thing, I could understand why you write like this. But, you'll improve along the way. Overall, this poem is filled with feelings that are so easily to see.. but, it lacks the poetic things that make a poem a poem. (: 4/5

I know how you feel...good job !
-LoSt IdEnTiTy