My Mother

(This is for my mother, Ethelyne Inez (Becky) Reynolds, April 3, 1921 - May 3, 2002. I don't know is this is free form, prose or what it would be called other than my tribute to my mother.)

I never realized how strong my mother was until she passed away
and I took a good look at our lives from the past until today.
She worked hard and was the glue that held our family together for many years,
never showing her fears.

My father stopped drinking when I was thirteen
and by then the damage to our family was evident.
She never stopped loving him,
and stood by him through all the trials and tribulations in their life.

She continued to work,
and she supported him in all that he chose to do.
Divorce is a word that I never heard mentioned in our home,
and she stayed beside him until he passed away.

As she grew older, I had expectations of her that she could no longer fulfill.
I expected her to do the things she did when I was growing up.
I expected her to cook meals, clean the house, bake pies and cakes.
I did not see her as growing older, I saw my mother as she use to be.

I began to realize how my mother felt as I aged and started to slow down myself.
My expectations were too high for her to meet.
I thought about these things for many months
and knew I had to tell her what I had come to realize.

I had to ask her to forgive me for setting those expectations for her.
To tell her that I understood why she could not do the things I expected.
She had her share of illnesses, her health was okay in May 2001
and she moved to Tennessee to live with my sister.

I delayed telling her the things I needed to say.
One year later, Thursday, May 2, 2002 came around
and for some reason I knew I had to talk to her and tell her how I felt.
I delayed once again and intended to call her on Friday.

A good friend of ours dropped by for a visit that morning.
We sat at the kitchen table, talking and the telephone rang.
I answered and my sister said I do not know how to tell you,
but mother died in her sleep last night.

What I am trying to say by writing this is,
do not put off talking to a loved one when you know you must.
Make it a priority to talk, do not delay for any reason,
no matter how important you think it may be.

Nothing is as important as telling someone you love how you feel
and to say you are sorry or whatever it may be you have to say to them.
You will find the words you need to express you feelings,
and they will be understood.

Since then I have talked to her,
even though she is no longer here.
My only regret is that I did not say those things to her before she died.
I know that she heard me and I have found peace in that.

Copyright 2007 Sylvia All Rights Reserved