Is it something tough and hard that�s beating me from the inside?
It's killing me each and every time!
You know life keeps on crumbling down
It's a field of glorious despair
Take me down
Are you so cruel as to be kind to me now?
Is it too much to ask that you be consistent in your opinion of me?
Don't do this to me
I don't need you to be
Something you're not
I need to hate you
So I can love again
The wolves are running, howling in our midst
Chasing me down
Your hand at the leashes that spring from their strong necks
Don't do this to me
I will fight again
Strong again
Though you beat me down
Mental structure destabilised
Crumbling down
It's all too much for me
Are you really this cruel as to be kind to me now?
I have no sympathy for you now
I need to hate you so I can forget
How feeling escapes you
Do you even know how to regret?
Terror and fear and utter repulsion
There's a hand at my waist
You try to calm me down
Whispered words, softly spoken
So sickly patronising
I hate it when you treat me like something I'm not
There are insecurities buried deep that I don't want you to see
There are troubles in my mind, but you need to have been there to see
The mess you've made for me
Are you so cruel as to be kind to me now?
Is it too much to ask that you be consistent in your opinion of me?
Sometimes I just wish I could hate you more, and then I won't hurt so bad
When betrayal is not in the blood in the skin
But on the floor and I can hate, hate, hate again
You tell me to wait, to shut the hell up
To believe you once again
To let you get away again
I've grown since you walked over me
Like the rug to wipe your feet on
I'm back and stronger
I won't let you break me
This is what you've made me
Heartbreak in my eyes you see
Cracks in my straining heart
Could you really be so cruel as to be kind to me?
I need more friends above
Who'll come and shelter me
From the blows a word can strike
From the blows your fist can make
I never knew anger was so ugly
Or blackened sleep so good
A relief from the hatred burning in your eyes
I used to think the dark depths held something else
Something wonderful and new
Mysterious and curiosity drove me through
What a soul was to be found, blacker than the doorways
Darker than the night
I cannot remember how it felt to stand in sunlight
The shadows make me shiver
I feel a warm hand clutch mine tight
I draw it in to shield me, but that won't protect me
Not when your fingers tighten, when they tug and tear me
Try to tame me
I dare you to try and tame me!
I need to hate you so I can forget
The pain you have leant me
But I swear I don�t keep debts
The pain is yours for the taking
And you will
Whispered words, softly spoken
So sickly patronising
I hate it when you treat me like something I'm not
Are you so cruel as to be kind to me now?
Is it too much to ask that you be consistent in your opinion of me?
