Petty Pretty Petty

"Your ribcage fits my fingers,
Gentle as if not there at all,
Angles of your body and mind,
Tempers stretched so tall."

^^ I really like this opening stanza, straight away there's so much depth and emotion that I'm pulled right into the piece, and the imagery portrayed is beautifully done.

"You'll promise me so far away that
Distance is just a barrier we knit,
Desperation is the yarn, humming,
Then singing, "is it? it is. is it?""

^^ I love this stanza, the closing line creates such a sense of mystery that as the reader I can't wait to find out more.

"Say it again, for old times sake,
"Grey is a solution for the indecisive mind,
Cause black and white should never meet".
Umbrella fingertips, you're the grey kind."

^^In my opinion, strongest stanza so far, I find this to hold almost as much power as the rest of the piece put together, and the melancholy in these lines is almost overwhelming, it certainly creates so many emotions for me.

"I'll play all the instruments,
Pretend they are your bones,
Drumming to the beat of jealousy
And of how you feel so alone. "

^^ I'm not to sure on this stanza, only because the last one was so strong and this one seems to become a little weaker than the rest of the piece.

That being said, I adore this piece, the flow is beautiful throughout, imagery paints beautiful pictures and I found this to be both original and unique in concept.

I've read this poem in your blog but I didn't know you already posted it here..
This is-just as the others- such a mind-blowing piece.
I'm just so in love with your wording and your mind, you have such a talent!
This piece was absolutely full of uniqueness, I've never read a poem about an umbrella, that was truly creative

Say it again, for old times sake,
"Grey is a solution for the indecisive mind,
Cause black and white should never meet".
Umbrella fingertips, you're the grey kind.

you left me speechless with writing this stanza, I'm in total awe.. especially concerning to the second line of the stanza..I mean really Wow !!

Do I have to say more?? guess not..I'm only going to recommend your poetry to all my friend on P&Q..You're so underestimated!!!

Until then..
Write on :]
Nee xx

This is the best you've ever written.

and i'm doing okay.