Sarcastic opus

Ive never read a poem where I felt like it was a play...in my mind I felt like I was watching this play and the violins we're strumming leading up to the very end, laughing. Applauding. It was such an intense read, a lot of people may disagree with the overpowering word choice you used but I loved it...such and edgy mysterious piece you crafted here. Well done.

I have read your work a few times on occassion, but haven't done so in awhile. I agree with the other poets that your vocabulary is particular, clever, and diverse. It teaches me a lot about the meaning words have as well as our knowledge to expand it. There are definitely words that we may never have known existed!

I also liked how you structured this piece, how every line didn't have to be a full sentence. It gave it a more emphaszied, purposeful tone.

In the beginning lines, I autotatically have this sense of foreboding. You give the time and have the reader wonder about the "mechanical gears" and what power they have.

Second stanza: I can easily imagine this wide open space full of these creatures who are unaware.

"Paraphrasing thoughts struck and welded, recondite, echo, but never received."

- This was such a fascinating line. It makes me think of a message that is used over and over again but that doesn't communicate well enough. It doesn't help one grow.

With your poetry I find myself looking for that deeper meaning, taking in each and every word. I also know you don't just spill words out that may sound enticing. There is a reason. If anything, it encourages me to slow down when reading and let each word show me this scene you are creating. I know I used to use a lot of adjectives, big words when I was younger in a few poems... and it didn't add to the poem because I wasn't comfortable with them. I just threw them in there thoughtlessly. But there is great thought here.

"Voices will be silenced. Throats will be slit. Truncheons used."

- Your bold, direct telling of this makes the horror more realistic. You are simply conveying, without doubt, what will occur. I also like how it gives the reader a sense of finality. It also seems like you are passive to it or sadly wise in seeing nothing can be done to stop this violence.

"Mind you, it is only a tragedy to witness. Let not politic oppression suppress your desires, for happiness is sold in small packets. The price is rather small. An iota of your dignity shall you lend."

- Loved reading this, creative way of putting it! It makes me think of those who want to act upon seeing injustices that surround them but don't directly affect them.... versus those who see it happen in their world but choose to take care of themselves, move on, savor what life they have. Could definitely feel your tone here!

"Babel whispers guaranteed."

- Haven't heard "Babel" used as an adjective before here. This was neat and speaks of those voices, those confused voices, that will carry on.

"But for now, cardinal curtains withdraw. The stage contains but a man, a women, a child."

- I liked the twist (in a way?) here, where you introduce that maybe life was all played out on a stage. You introduce these three members of humans, maybe a role model type of family. A standard.

Good suspense in the next few lines... as if they are dressed to have no expression, only for the world's entertainment.

"Vellicate not over this scene you have purchased."

- Had to look up "vellicate" of course and found it means to twitch or pluck. I like how differently you phrase this. To me, it means not to stress or concern one's self with what one is witnessing, what event one could have contributed to.

I really thought the ending was well-done. It gave this imagery, the senses of a real show being put on with the drums and appeals.

The end leaves me cold. Like that is all that will remain, laughter and applause. Nothing more. No one will fight for morals/values, etc. They will all just fall back on that action.

I admire how you didn't state what exactly happened to the man, woman and child. I guessed death at the end but that it was a build-up. They were the victims right? And human cruelty elongated their execution, whatever reason it was for, to gain amusement.

Such an interesting piece! Glad you shared and hope you will always keep writing.

This perhaps was one of the greatest poems of our generation. left me speechless. your use of words were uncanny. Supreme poem

Your writing style reminds of Edgar allen poe! i love his works and im really enjoying reading yours! you are very talented<3 keep it up!!

<3katie

"Voices will be silenced. Throats will be slit. Truncheons used. Today! tachyons of truth will go unheard. No faith ignited. Mind you, it is only a tragedy to witness. Let not politic oppression suppress your desires, for happiness is sold in small packets. The price is rather small. An iota of your dignity shall you lend."

^ Wow!!!!!!! a very powerful poem as a whole but for me this stanza took my breath away

5/5