A reverie (revised)

by A lonely soul   Mar 17, 2012

Meandering, on life's broken trails
I stroll wistfully amongst sleeping willows
lost in somber thoughts,
beneath a half moon sky

Feet, traverse a bridled track
lit up by a soft glow
of ephemeral memories,
as thoughts struggle
to find a way around

Suddenly, I see a familiar shadow
mirrored upon a lake,
was it my stretched imagination, or
a shimmering Luna
reflected on tranquil waters,
uncovered by a passing cloud

Perhaps, a deja vu,
from my day dream
of a silvery luminescence
off an angel's face
playing tricks on the mind

Tranquil breezes
whistling by my ears
stir up, ardent
strummings of words unspoken
in my heart

A brain, impregnated with
sweet memories unburied
rewinds to foggy visions of
lambent irises,
waltzing with mischief
on a soft, resplendent face

An enchanting smile
like no other, one
that I still treasure
deep within, to this day
and will, forever

Youthful dreams, of
a child in me, craving
for lost days of audacity,
still wishful he could grab the moon
and steal its moonshine

Alas, today
those yearnings
can only be a reverie,
a daydream of a fool
who lost his sunshine
many moons ago
to a love, denied.


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Latest Comments

  • 8 years ago

    by Robert Gardiner

    An Elequent and Wxquisite Write!!!

  • 9 years ago

    by Half Husband Half father

    Its very beautiful sad poem, nice use of imagery loved ur style 5/5 :-)

  • 9 years ago

    by Innocent Fairy

    Wow I can definitely say this is better still a little of somewhere but perhaps in the breaking of flow but great write none the less and I enjoyed reading it,,I love the word choice :) great scenery

    My comment before revised---

    This feels to me a beautiful picture but a broken puzzle,,it's greatly and amazingly worded and really pulls you in to an abstract dream full of wonders and a glow and a great full moon,,,so great job with scenery :)

  • 9 years ago

    by Decayed

    Hands, ready to grab the moon
    and steal its moonshine

    ^ I had to stop at these two lines and say: wow! I really like the scenery you have drawn before my eyes especially that it is night in here :)

    David, what is better than your comments are your pieces.

    I have to tell you that the end,,,, I haven't expected that at all! It was a shocker. I mean 95% of the poem, i was daydreaming with you... I felt even like walking on the moon. But then, in the end, all changed.


  • 9 years ago

    by Hellon

    Just going to focus on your first two stanzas for now..if that's ok?

    I walk slowly
    lost in somber thoughts
    beneath a half moon sky
    amongst sleeping willows


    This has no dimension to it IMO.starting a poem off with I annoys me...sorry...and...there's nothing there to keep my interest...

    Slowly walking
    alone, with sombre thoughts
    'neath a half moon
    I stroll amist sleeping willows???

    Feet tread a broken path, lit up
    by a soft glow
    of ephemeral memories
    as thoughts struggle
    to find a way around

    Once more feet tread a broken path
    the soft glow...ephemeral memories
    as thought struggle
    to find their way...

    Just some thoughts...