I was only thirteen

My life is so depressing,
I am broken inside,
the true beauty that lays within,
I've always had to hide.

Oh, what beauty,
what am I talking about?
"There is something beautiful in everyone,"
is a phrase I strongly doubt.

I am down on the lowest level,
as low as you could possibly be,
the only person that I truly hate,
honestly has to be me.

Sitting here,
not worth a dime,
I am cutting myself,
is that a crime?

Not really,
I am doing you all a favor,
because all of you hate
me and my behavior.

Even though none of you,
say it directly to my face,
every time you're seen with me,
I feel your disgrace.

Why don't you say it straight to me?
Instead of thinking your evil thought,
nothing can hurt me more right now,
than the pain you've already brought.

To me you're all
demons in disguise,
I hate the way you look at me
with your evil eyes.

Your eyes, they tell,
more than words could ever say,
your eyes are telling me
that you want me to go away.

Okay, so I'm not pretty,
I'm aware of that,
but do you have to make things worse
by calling me fat?

Don't you think,
I can hear what you say?
I can,
and it brings me down each and every day.

It hurts me more,
than you will ever know,
but you're too blind
to see through my show.

I guess I fooled you,
didn't I?
If only you knew
how often I cry.

I cry and cut myself,
every night,
blood and tears mixed,
-it's an awful sight.

Today was the last day,
I had to pretend,
tonight it will all
come to an end.

I crawl up in my bed,
as the tears burn in my eyes,
is this what happens
to a person who lives behind lies?

I don't care,
I pick up the knife,
I just want to end this living hell,
which I call my life.

My wrists are slit,
and I feel so small,
but I don't regret it,
I don't regret it at all.

As I lay here in my bed,
I quietly begin to cry,
I open my mouth to take a last breath,
and then I slowly die.

I didn't mean anything,
and now I'm gone,
so forget about me
because life goes on.

I wasn't important,
I wasn't like the rest,
though I tried to fit in,
I really did my best.

Now do you regret it?
Now that I'm dead,
do you regret
every cruel word you ever said?

You always enjoyed,
to make me feel small,
it's a sickening thought,
but it made you feel tall.

It's unbelievable, what people can find,
in their human hearts to do,
words are the reason I killed myself,
it's all because of you.

And one last thing,
something I have to tell,
I hope you all have a miserable life,
and that you burn in hell.

You made me do it,
you made me commit suicide,
you took away all I had,
you took away my pride.

I was never popular,
or a beauty queen,
you never even gave me a chance,
I was only thirteen.

©